Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I am a bitter b!tch

I am bitter b/c  everyone of my IRL friends ute seems to be working right now and mine isn't.  It is making me so bitter.  Don't get me wrong, I don't want anyone else's baby, just mine and DH's, but I am very afraid we will never get pregnant again- I just don't understand how we could get pregnant once without even trying and now we can't get pregnant at all! 

Another friend emailed me last night to tell me that she is 3 months pregnant.  I tried to be happy for her, but I am really not because it is just another reminder that my ute hates me.  She is 16 weeks today and is already 99% sure she his having a boy even though she is suppose to find out the sex in 2 weeks.Indifferent  Um okay- another friend had the same thing happen to her- she was 99% sure she was having a boy and they did the big apt and tell her she is having a girl. 

I broke down last night and cried myself to sleep.  DH understands, but still thinks I need to stop "stressing and worrying" about all of this stuff.  Um, easier said than done, DH! If I could I would stop "stressing and worrying".

Thanks for letting me vent.  I needed to get all of this out and DH, as good as he is, just doesn't quite understand where I am coming from with all of this stuff sometimes.  

Monday, September 28, 2009

Christmas

Mom, dad and grandma are coming.  I found the BEST christmas gift for them...

2010 Calendar Girls Calendar

It is the one based off of the movie!   I loved the movie and ams so happy that I can get the calendar!

SA results

DH's sperm are starting to look healthier! The SA that we had him do at the beginning of the month came back. Great count: 85 Million; Great motility: 81%; not as great morphology 11 % (This was done with the stricter Kruger method of counting morph. so to be in a "good" range would be to have a count at 14-15%.)

DH quit smoking in June and that could be the cause of bad morph issues. Also Shady Grove put him on antibiotics so that should also help!

Here is what I found online about bad morphology..

  • Common causes of abnormal morphology include varicocele, drugs, heat, infrequent ejaculation, infection and smoking. If the man ejaculates on a regular basis three to four times each week, I advise taking antioxidant vitamins and a brief course of antibiotics. A repeat semen analysis will be performed in one to two months. If the problem persists, intrauterine insemination may be necessary. If a pregnancy has not occurred after three to six cycles, in vitro fertilization with ICSI (sperm injection) may be considered. 
 But when I was talking with the nurse about all this, she mentioned that my insurance has not approved the treatment yet, so we are unsure if we will be able to do an IUI in Oct.  BCBS requires an authorization.  We should get it, but who knows when it will come... all this waiting and we will see stuff is driving me crazy!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

The Family Building Act of 2009

I think this is something very important for all people facing infertility...
Dear Friends and Family,

I don't normally do this, but occasionally a piece of legislation occurs that "catches my eye." The one that has caught my eye is the Family Building Act of 2009. I feel that is a very important piece of legislation, so I would like to take this time and encourage you to write your Senator and Representative and encourage them to support these bills.
The Family Building Act of 2009 (H.R. 697, S. 1258) "takes an important first step toward improving the way insurers view infertility," but it is "not a silver bullet for improving the way [in vitro fertilization] treatments are conducted and covered," John Zhang, founder and director of the New Hope Fertility Center in New York City, writes in an opinion piece in The Hill. The bill, introduced by Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-N.Y.) in the House and Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-N.Y.) in the Senate, would require health insurance companies that cover obstetrical services to cover non-experimental treatment of infertility, including IVF.

I am including sample letters to your representatives and senators with this email. All you need to do is fill in your information, and send it to your congressmen.
  • Find your representative here
  • Find your U.S Senators here
__________________________________________________________________________
The Honorable Mark R. Warner
United States Senate
459A Russell Senate Office Building
Washington, DC 20510

Dear Senator Warner,

As a voter and a constituent, I urge you to support the following bill that would provide coverage for infertility treatment:
  • S 1258, The Family Building Act of 2009 which would require insurance coverage of infertility treatments by all health plans that also cover obstetrical benefits.
According to the CDC, infertility is a medically recognized disease that affects 7.3 million men and women in our country. Still, many insurance companies do not provide coverage for treatment to overcome this disease, but single out infertility for exclusion. I find this to be discriminatory. Well-managed insurance coverage will not place a large burden on insurance companies. Studies have shown that infertility coverage may actually reduce costs by limiting costly treatments that have low rates of success in treating the underlying problem.

In fact, a recent employer survey conducted by the consulting firm William M. Mercer found that 91 percent of respondents offering infertility treatment have not experienced an increase in their medical costs as a result of providing this coverage.

Insurers argue that bearing children is a lifestyle choice. In fact it is. But it is not a choice to have a disease that prevents a person from having the option to bear children. Insurers raise concerns about some treatments and the possibility of multiple births and the associated costs. Reproductive doctors are careful to help couples minimize the risks associated with multiple births. A study published in the New England Journal of Medicine (Aug 29, 2002) concludes that the incidence of multiple births is actually lower in states that have enacted an infertility insurance requirement than in states without coverage, because couples with insurance coverage are free to make medical decisions when pursuing some infertility treatments, as opposed to other couples who must also weigh financial considerations that often result in medical risk taking, multiple births and a high rate of complications during and post-pregnancy.

In 1998, the United States Supreme Court ruled that reproduction is a major life activity under the "Americans with Disabilities Act." This ruling demonstrates the importance of reproduction and the impact that infertility, in which the ability to reproduce is impaired, has on the lives of men and women.

Many affected by infertility do not feel comfortable speaking publicly about this very private struggle, but we represent all racial, religious, and ethnic groups, as well as both sexes. We are neighbors, co-workers, friends and relatives, and we just want to experience the joy of raising families without having to bankrupt ourselves in the process. Please support infertility coverage legislation and help fulfill the dreams of thousands of couples waiting for a family to love.
Thank you for supporting S 1258.

Sincerely,

Name and Address here



_____________________________________________________________________________________


The Honorable Frank R. Wolf
United States House of Representatives
241 Cannon Building
Washington, DC  20515
Dear Congressman Wolf,

As a voter and a constituent, I urge you to co-sponsor the following bill that would provide coverage for infertility treatment:
  • HR 697, The Family Building Act of 2009 which would require insurance coverage of infertility treatments by all health plans that also cover obstetrical benefits.
According to the CDC, infertility is a medically recognized disease that affects 7.3 million men and women in our country. Still, many insurance companies do not provide coverage for treatment to overcome this disease, but single out infertility for exclusion. I find this to be discriminatory. Well-managed insurance coverage will not place a large burden on insurance companies. Studies have shown that infertility coverage may actually reduce costs by limiting costly treatments that have low rates of success in treating the underlying problem.

In fact, a recent employer survey conducted by the consulting firm William M. Mercer found that 91 percent of respondents offering infertility treatment have not experienced an increase in their medical costs as a result of providing this coverage.

Insurers argue that bearing children is a lifestyle choice. In fact it is. But it is not a choice to have a disease that prevents a person from having the option to bear children. Insurers raise concerns about some treatments and the possibility of multiple births and the associated costs. Reproductive doctors are careful to help couples minimize the risks associated with multiple births. A study published in the New England Journal of Medicine (Aug 29, 2002) concludes that the incidence of multiple births is actually lower in states that have enacted an infertility insurance requirement than in states without coverage, because couples with insurance coverage are free to make medical decisions when pursuing some infertility treatments, as opposed to other couples who must also weigh financial considerations that often result in medical risk taking, multiple births and a high rate of complications during and post-pregnancy.

In 1998, the United States Supreme Court ruled that reproduction is a major life activity under the "Americans with Disabilities Act." This ruling demonstrates the importance of reproduction and the impact that infertility, in which the ability to reproduce is impaired, has on the lives of men and women.

Many affected by infertility do not feel comfortable speaking publicly about this very private struggle, but we represent all racial, religious, and ethnic groups, as well as both sexes. We are neighbors, co-workers, friends and relatives, and we just want to experience the joy of raising families without having to bankrupt ourselves in the process. Please support infertility coverage legislation and help fulfill the dreams of thousands of couples waiting for a family to love.

Thank you for co-sponsoring HR 697.

Sincerely,

Name and address here


Happy Birthday to me...

So it is my birthday. I am 34...35 is just around the corner. I am very hopeful we can get pregnant before I turn 35!

Jason and I are going estate sale shopping. I made him pinky swear last night that there will be no WoW today. He is addicted to WoW, so I thought since this is my birthday he should spend one day away from his addiction for the sake of his wife. I am hopeful it works. He did pout when I made him pinky swear, though. I so married the right man for me! The pout was cute! :-)

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

My terrible, horrible no good day! (Thank you, Alexander!)

I woke up at 2 am with an eye infection. I realized it was probably conjunctivitis (pink eye) at about 4 am when I just could not get back to sleep. So I called into work. Then I called and called and got into the Dr.

But I still had my AM yearly OB apt. at 9 am. So I went to that, but it was okay especially after the HSG I had earlier in the month. I LOVE my OB. Every time I go there she makes me feel so good and is like my own little TTC cheerleader! She told me that she hopes to see me again soon within a month when I am KU. She said that she knows IUI's don't usually work the first month for people, but she has a feeling it will work for me. It made me feel so good! After the hell of the first OB who made me cry in the office on the first visit and told me that I had only 2 years to get KU, she is such a breath of fresh air! Big Smile She confirmed that I had a yeast infection and wrote me a prescription for diflucan. (Oh joy!)

Next, I had the regular Dr's apt. Turns out I was correct and I do have pink eye! Oh joy! So for 7 days I have to do the eye drops.

Then I went to the pharmacist, who took one look at all the prescriptions and declared that I was having a bad day! Indifferent He then gave me a pink pen to make me feel better!

Why does all of this crap have to happen all at once on one day? Seriously world, why am a cursed???

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

RE apt.

So I finally met with the RE after having to reschedule the apt so many times b/c DH insisted he had to be there and kept traveling to Texas!

So this months plan is to do all the tests, that I knew I needed but my OB did not want to do anything more b/c of DH's SA results. I go for the CD 3 Blood draw tomorrow and then it will be a HSG on Monday. DH got to redo his SA at home and felt so much more happy about it. Our RE does not like LabCorp, where DH had to do the SA the first two times. Apparently DH was not the only one who had issues with it. Shady Grove will do the lab work in house, so that means he could take it home and drive it in, which was so much better than going to a room by the front door that has a window where you can see people's feet (that was with LabCorp).

If the test all come back okay we will start IUIs in October. Insurance will cover 6 of them. Anything else will be out of pocket. DH and I think that if nothing comes from the IUIs we are going to try the dreaded out-of-pocket expense of IVF.

It feels great to finally have a plan and to start getting all these tests done. Hopefully DH will stick around long enough to do the IUI's. The RE did say we could do frozen IUI's with the same clinic in Maryland. Frozen IUI's are where they freeze DH's sperm and unfreeze it and insert it in me at my O time. She said she doesn't like to do that though, b/c it can damage his spermies. So now I am praying that DH stays around long enough for us to do all of this...

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Husband is home!

Last night I picked up my husband from the airport. He came home from his week in Texas. I am still mad at Texas for stealing my husband away for most of the summer. I know I will get over it, but I need time. :-) It is nice to have him back, though. We are going to his sister, Jenny's wedding and going to see my parents this weekend in the state of Washington. I am looking forward to it.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

WHY WHY WHY?

Why would anyone want to be pregnant for a total of 12 years and have 19 children?
See story here.

In the beginning...

This is the start to recording my journey in life.  I am an educator who works in the development of educational curriculum.  I married my husband on 4/6/08.  We where going to get married on 8/8/08, but in November of 2007, I discovered that I was pregnant.  We ended up miscarrying the baby at 11 weeks in January of 2008.  That was probably one of the hardest things I have ever been through.  But I had the loving support of My husband and we got through it.  We decided to go ahead and start trying to conceive again after our wedding.  So far we have been unlucky in that department, but we hope that one day, our dream of expanding our family will become a reality.

We have one very big and very goofy dog, Dante.  He is a Bovier des Flanders.  The breed was bred to heard bulls... yep you read correctly- bulls.  Basically cows and bulls will walk in the direction their face is facing.  Boviers will jump up and move the bull's face into the direction it needs to go.  They have a beautiful "bounce" and are very independent, but still need to be in the same room as you are in.    As Dante has gotten older he has discovered he has a voice and can bark.  Now he loves to bark at people.  When he was younger he NEVER barked.  His bark is so deep that every time he barks, I jump.